Last week, B and I were taking a shower together (leave now if this stuff is too much) and as things climbed up the physical ladder, we came to discover that my legs are just too fking long to get it on standing up.

I kind of shrugged, and added, "its not like we havent done it before, I guess tonights just not our night".

And then he says to me, "yeah, didnt we do something really crazy like, pull the shower curtain down or something? (chuckle)"

I'm all: *crickets*

and then: "Um .. no. Must've been someone else".

Thats about where the wave of...jealousy? suspicion? irritation? bewilderment? came along and took over. I asked him to please just get out and leave me alone for a few minutes and despite his lame attempt to smooth it over, I was completely mortified that he'd just confused me with an interlude he'd had previously with SOMEONE ELSE.

The mental images were disturbing enough, I removed myself from his house entirely and just couldn't seem to shake that one. Maybe it's because he has lived in that house with two other females prior to me (and have been intimate with both). I dont know what it is, but it just didnt sit right with me.

Now a week later, I am much more passive and accepting of it, we all have a past and that's normal.

But part of me still wonders...

xxx unclassy